[InsaneJournal is down and won't let me update, so I'm back to LJ for today.]

Today I found a link to Joss Whedon's commentary on the murder of Dua Khalil, a young woman who was killed almost exactly one year ago. Her death is yet another instance of the abuse of women being treated as a spectator sport - and in the year since, that has not changed. The reason Joss' entry surfaced again is that a charity anthology, Nothing But Red, was written to commemorate Khalil's murder and raise money for Equality Now, and it has just been released.

I never read Joss' entry last year, but I'm glad I found it now. If you are like me and also missed it, I want to bring this it to your attention now for two reasons: the first is that, as to be expected, Joss writes very eloquently about Khalil's death, as well as the pervasiveness of misogyny and sexual oppression.

The second reason is this quote:

"Women’s inferiority – in fact, their malevolence -- is as ingrained in American popular culture as it is anywhere they’re sporting burkhas. I find it in movies, I hear it in the jokes of colleagues, I see it plastered on billboards, and not just the ones for horror movies. Women are weak. Women are manipulative. Women are somehow morally unfinished."

I appreciate that Joss does not use this event as a call to arms for feminism that relies on perpetuating racist and imperialist power differences. In other words, he does not seek to protect women from misogyny by redirecting our malice against non-white men and non-U.S. cultures. Too often, the response - the feminist response, even - to news such as this is one of, "Look how awful they are," and "We should help those women over there." Villainizing minority men, infantilizing minority women, and ignoring the whole heap of steaming bullshit that is sexism in the United States.

I do not feel safe from misogyny for being born in the U.S. In fact, when my so-called "liberal" or "progressive" male peers decry "foreign" sexism but refuse to acknowledge the necessity of combatting or even acknowledging their own privilege - I don't feel very safe at all. Finding one more male ally who not only challenges his male privilege, but also refuses to soothe his ego by relying on his racial privilege, gives me some hope.

Furthermore, "[O]verweight people have a lower death rate because they are much less likely to die from a grab bag of diseases that includes Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s, infections and lung disease. And that lower risk is not counteracted by increased risks of dying from any other disease, including cancer, diabetes or heart disease."

Take that, popular conceptions of health that assume heavier = unhealthy.

( blah blah me stuff )

I also recommend checking out Kate Harding's BMI Project. Especially for the triathletes who are labelled as "morbidly obese." Yeah.

Wear black (or green) on Thursday, September 20 to show solidarity with the Jena Six.

If you aren't aware of the Jena Six, go here for the story.

Then wear black or green, and tell people why. Raise awareness of institutionalized racism in the legal system.

But two men managed to make use of the ruling a couple of hours before it was stayed. Go them. XD

Let's name some names, so we remember who's a homophobe and who's not:

Polk County Judge Robert Hanson ruled that the state law banning same-sex marriage must be nullified, severed and stricken from the books, and the marriage laws "must be read and applied in a gender neutral manner so as to permit same-sex couples to enter into a civil marriage ..."

On the other hand, County attorney John Sarcone is appealing that ruling, which led Hanson to stay the ruling while the appeal is being resolved. Clearly, he's looking out for the best interests of his constituents - just not any of the gay ones, of course.

Dennis Johnson, the lawyer for the plaintiffs in the case to overturn the Defense of Marriage Act, says that the Act contradicts previous rulings regarding civil rights and is simply "mean spirited."

But of course that can't be right, can it? The DoMA isn't about oppression, just personal opinion - at least, according to Governor Chet Culver, who says that "While some Iowans may disagree on this issue, I personally believe marriage is between a man and a woman." Proving the point that heterosexist marriage laws are just about personal beliefs, Republican House Minority Leader Christopher Rants says that the ruling illustrates the need for a state constitutional amendment banning gay marriage.

Oh, and in contrast, here's what one of those heterosexual-oppressing, U.S.-hating abominations has to say:

"This is it. We're married. I love you." - Sean Fritz to his new husband, Tim McQuillan.

Jeffrey McKee was convicted of raping two women, but received a lighter prison sentence because his victims were prostitutes.

Luckily, there are people in the Washington state judicial system who aren't total fuckwits.

Read the article for the full story, but here are a few notable quotes that illustrate the persistent sexism and victim-blaming in public attitudes towards sexual violence. Sure, society says, we'll protect the victims of rape - but only if you're the right kind of victim.

( Newsflash: working as a prostitute doesn't actually reduce the gravity of a rape )

x-posted to Shrub.com

Reading the anti-feminist whinings of entitlement-junkies tends to get my blood boiling, but there are a few things that are just too funny to get mad about. Like, say, talking about men who are misandrist - and using Joss Whedon as your example. Because, y'know, if ever there was a man who loathed his own gender, and relegated male characters to the same sort of trivializing and degrading roles that misogynist creators use for female characters, it's Joss. All those well-rounded male characters with unique forms of internal strength and ingenuity, damn him.

He must be a misandrist in the same way Jackson Katz is. Or the same way that Tim Wise hates white people. God forbid someone call out their own group on their privileged bullshit.

(Does that make me self-hating, too, when I examine straight privilege or classism? Oh, but wait, clearly I hate men and white people too, right? So I guess I'm limited in my social circle to lesbians of color. Who better not be wealthy, damn them.)

Or maybe, just maybe, this is another case of the normalization of oppression, in which abuses of members of disadvantaged groups are ho-hum, but the slightest infraction against the privileged group is ZOMG! SUCH A CRIME. If members of a group are not "allowed" to do something, it's that much more of an offense when they do. Criticizing a dude's privilege? That's surely as grievous as belittling misogyny or commodifying rape!

That's why, you see, white kids who beat up a black kid are charged with battery, but black kids who beat up a white kid in relatiation are charged with attempted murder. Oh, and those nooses? Just a joke, you oversensitive PC-nazis!

*sigh* Sometimes there's too much ignorance in the world to comprehend.

Oh, well - I guess I can just go spit in a white man's coffee and make up for the history of colonialism or something.

Still decompressing. The Daily has an article on it in today's issue. Here's a rundown of how it went for me:

( The rally and aftermath )

Thus ends SARVA Week 2007. It was pretty crazy for me since I was much more involved this year, but it was totally worth it. The other events of the week were all fantastic (though more humorous than heavy, and so not really worth attempting to translate into a blog post).

I hope you're all wearing jeans today for our Denim Day remembrance/protest. I've been wearing my SARVA Week t-shirt all week, so my co-workers all know about it and a bunch of them are wearing jeans today. :D

Oh, and ha ha.

kyonkun pointed me toward today's issue of The Daily, our campus newspaper, for more news about Monday's murder.

Today's issue presents some interesting juxtapositions. ( Good, bad, and in-between )

As Seattle-area folks might have heard, yesterday morning there was a shooting on campus that killed two people. Police have deemed it a murder-suicide, with the alleged perpetrator being the ex-boyfriend of the victim. He had been stalking her for two months, and she had already sought help from multiple sources.

The following is a message from the university president, emailed to everyone on campus:

( Read more... )

I appreciate the university administration putting forth an official gesture of sympathy. However, it's also problematic in a few ways: there is no mention of the domestic violence/gendered violence aspect of the crime, which makes the murder seem like an isolated incident rather than part of a society-wide pattern. Of course, the president did acknowledge that this kind of violence happens "all too often," but note that he also characterizes it as "senseless," thereby obscuring the pervasive nature of domestic violence, particularly against women. Also, it being SARVA Week and Sexual Assault Awareness Month, he really failed when he advertised only palliative resources (grief counseling, etc.) and completely ignored the preventative action being taken on this campus right at this moment.

So. What to do about that, right? It didn't occur to me that something could be done until one of my friends forwarded to me and some other classmates the response she had sent to the president, addressing these very issues. Then, in response, another person sent another email, advocating a collective effort to get the president's attention - which finally made me realize that I could do the same (I'm a little slow ...). Emails have been sent to the campus newspaper as well, so that in case the president doesn't respond at least someone will know.

How simple was that? There was ignorance; we spoke against it. It was a simple thing to do, and I don't know how much effect it will have. But at least it was a way for us to take action against a problem.

As I learn how to engage in activism, there are a lot of reasons to get discouraged, so I'm glad to have this small example of how it can be easy.

By the way: I encourage all members of the University of Washington to join in writing these emails, so the president can see how many people care about this issue.

The New York Times has an article about a group of New York schools who have started requiring cheerleaders to girls' basketball games as well as boys'.

Not surprisingly, there are a lot of complaints to this new policy, most of them being some variation of, "But we don't waaaaaaannaaaaaaaa." Mostly, this is because the added workload of cheering at girls' games has required the schools to stop sending cheerleaders to the boys' away games. Because, you know, of course we're all equal now and Title IX is outdated and female athletes are on equal footing with the boys ... except, you know, when giving girls equal support means actually having to take something away from the boys (gasp!).

To the Times' credit, the article itself is rather well-balanced - not very surprising, since the Times is part of the Lib-rul Media and all. However, there were a couple of ... interesting quotes just ripe for analysis:

( more )

I have a ton of blog reading to catch up on, due to the fact that the last five days were jammed full with getting all of my Christmas shopping, writing all of my final papers, and doing all my winter-time celebrating (i.e., holiday party and my birthday). But here's the first thing to jump out at me:

Via Jenn at Reappropriate, Rosie O'Donnell makes a racist (anti-Chinese) joke. And surprise, surprise, no one does a goddamn thing about it.

One of the reasons this pisses me off so much is that I recently heard about O'Donnell having a public spar with Kelly Ripa over Ripa's homophobic comment. Ripa insisted she didn't intend to be homophobic, and O'Donnell replied, "I'm just saying from where I sit as a gay person in the world that I have to tell you, that's how it came off to me." In other words, as the non-privileged person, she (rightly) has the broader perspective concerning what is privileged or bigoted. However, when O'Donnell says that her racist comment "was not meant to mock," and Asian-Americans try to assert their perspective, we're told that we just don't have a sense of humor.

Bigoted "humor" is one of the things I hate most. Because when you try to call someone on their privilege, they always use the chickenshit response, "hey, it was a joke, get over it." Instead of taking two seconds to see what's wrong with what they said, they just carry blithely on. And what ends up as a throwaway comment for them is usually the 600th repetition of the oppression I have to face every damn day.

So, Ms. O'Donnell, let me tell you - being a lesbian who knows a lot about queer issues doesn't give you a free pass concerning other forms of oppression. Yes, white women can be racist too - that's kind of what one of the giant schisms in Western feminism is all about.

You know what? Just like I'm tired of sexism in the anti-racist movement, it's also really fucking tiresome to have to deal with racism in the queer movement, feminism, and everything else.

And while we're at it, you know what's not okay? This whole "nobody's racist anymore, but sexism is all over the place" whining from white women who don't have a clue what it's like to deal with both. Or any other form of "my oppression is the only one still out there, so you shut up about yours." We're all stomped on in different ways, so stop trying to be the special snowflake whose hardship is the worst.

On another topic, go take a look at Hey Hetero!, a public art installation in Australia that highlights straight privilege. Which I've got in spades. (Because, you know, being yellow and female doesn't mean I get to forget that I'm a straight person who doesn't get harassed for the gender of my partner. Who'd've thunk?)

Here's what I read today at work before going to do a C.O.R.E. presentation.

According to a court in Maryland, a woman cannot withdraw consent to sex once it has begun.

Because, apparently, once a man sticks his penis in you, you lose all say over what happens to your own body. I guess this isn't terribly surprising, though, since that's the common conservative position on abortion - if you consented to have sex, then you lose the ability to decide what happens to your body if you get pregnant. It doesn't matter if the pregnancy is inconvenient, painful, damaging to your body, or even life-threatening. And now, apparently, it doesn't matter if sex does the same thing. You said 'yes' at one point, after all.

Does anyone else have an image of a three year-old whining, "No take-backs!"?

But wait, there's more! The court graciously explained the basis for this ruling, which was a law that states that raping a woman "de-flowers" her and is thus a loss for the man who owns her.

Maryland court in less than 50 words: You're not allowed to control your body once a man penetrates you. But that's okay, because your only worth is being a pristine virgin for the man who actually controls you anyway.

More here, here, and here.

You know, contrary to popular belief, I don't hate men because I'm a feminist. But I do hold a scathing contempt for a large number of them, namely the ones who are too selfish, lazy, stupid, or cruel to own up to their privilege. Particularly the ones who purport to be intelligent or even enlightened, and have the tools for education staring them in the face. I include judges in this category.

( which brings me to C.O.R.E. )

Go New Jersey!

The state Supreme Court gave the OK for gay unions to have the same benefits as straight couples, though it left the legislature to decide whether the unions should be "marriages" or not. (Because OH NOEZ teh gays will turn "marriage" into an evil word!!1!)

Here's a delicious quote from Matt Daniels, president of Alliance for Marriage: "The court is holding a legal gun to the head of the State Legislature, and saying, 'Listen, there are two bullets, you get to pick the bullet: either gay marriage or civil unions.'"

Yes, because gay people getting married is like SHOOTING STRAIGHT PEOPLE IN THE HEAD.

And here I thought that the whining from heteros about how gay marriage would hurt them had reached the limits of absurdity. But luckily there's this Daniels guy to show me that that isn't so.

Aaaaaaand there's more! Via wordweaverlynn, we have another response by Ellison regarding his groping of Connie Willis. And no, this isn't him dropping all sarcasm and misguided attempts at humor in order to make a straightforward, sincere apology. (We can only dream.)

Since jfpbookworm did such a great job deconstructing the first "apology", I think it's only fitting that we subject Ellison's newest offering to analysis as well. One, because he's so spectacularly idiotic - but more importantly, because of the unexamined privilege that drips from his words alongside the expected arrogance. He may be a talented writer, but that skill does nothing to save him from his underlying sexist assumptions.

( Apparently no one told him that humility is the better part of sincerity )

x-posted to Shrub.com

A few days ago at the Hugo Awards ceremony at Worldcon, Harlan Ellison groped Connie Willis on stage. The primary source of the news is pnh, a.k.a. Patrick Nielsen Hayden, though Ellison himself confirmed it inthe (ostensible) apology on his message board. (Text provided here by matociquala, a.k.a. Elizabeth Bear. Also see her post on the original incident.)

He wrote the "apology" yesterday, even though the event occurred a couple of days ago, because he had no idea that there was a problem until he saw the reaction online. In other words, he didn't know it was wrong until someone else told him. This is the kind of behavior that you would expect out of children developing their sense of politeness and ethics, not a grown man (especially one with as inflated a sense of self as Ellison apparently has).

Connie Willis is one of the most respected science fiction authors writing today - certainly one of the most well-known women in the field. She did not invite the groping, nor did she give him permission. Ellison calls it "intendedly-childlike," and supposedly it came as part of a comedic schtick. However, Willis was not previously informed about his intention, and since she immediately removed his hand and continued on without comment, it's obvious that she didn't feel inclined to join in on the "comedy."

His behavior - the fact that he even thought that this was an acceptable action (or at least funny, maybe "cheeky little bastard," but not reprehensibly sexist), and furthermore, had to be told that it wasn't - speaks to a deep disrespect for women. A disrespect that, really, isn't all that uncommon.

( Now don't misunderstand what I'm saying ... )

x-posted to Shrub.com

Sex is more satisfying in countries where women and men are considered equal.

In other news, studies find that conversations are more productive when both people are listening.

Two members of the Duke lacrosse team have been arrested and charged.

If you've been hiding in a cave and have somehow not heard anything about the Duke rape case, you can get a rundown of the story by going here. In a nutshell, the victim is a black female student from North Carolina Central University (historically black) and working mother, who was hired as an exotic dancer for a party by members of the lacrosse team at Duke (historically ... well). After being driven out of the party by racial slurs, she returned and was allegedly beaten and raped. Issues of sex, race, class, and the attending domination and entitlement, are rampant.

I've been following this story intermittently over the past few weeks, and sometimes I have to ignore it and pretend it doesn't exist. Cowardly, I know, but sometimes I feel so much anger and fear and sadness that I don't think I could find enough tears or shouting or violence to express.

Because what does this case, and the scenario described within it, make me think of? Yes, the "big three" of racism/sexism/classism - the overarching systems of inequality that permeate society. But also? Individual helplessness in the face of all of that. Because she's just one woman. A woman attempting to prosecute her rapist has a hard enough time, but she's also black, a stripper, and struggling financially: vulnerable to being dehumanized in so many ways. There's an entire system of power arrayed against her - an old, strong, entrenched culture that she has to face. It's not just wealth, or whiteness, or maleness that she has to face from her alleged attackers. It's more than that - it's the smug sense of entitlement, of superiority, that the culture infuses into people due to those qualities. Duke has had a long history of suffering mistreatment from athletes - from the lacrosse team in particular - because they are people who have never heard the word "no." Or, at least, heard it and had to obey. And if you think that sense of entitlement has nothing to do with being rich white boys - well, I just hope to God you're never on the opposite side of that power equation.

But it's not just lacrosse, or Duke, of course. It's everywhere. Everyone who's gone to high school with athletes knows the "boys will be boys" tolerance accorded to them (though whether they abused it is another matter). And anyone who's taken a long hard look at oppression knows the ways in which prejudice feeds into that mentality - most often sexism and homophobia, but racism and classism are hardly rare. And if you want to see it in action? Just look at some of the blog posts being made about the issue. News stories, too - though they're more subtle about it. On the other hand, you can try looking at the more equitable treatment being given to the story in the left-leaning blogs - Pandagon, Alas, a Blog, Feministe - and read the comments there. Again, a lot of people try to couch their bigotry in soft words, but some don't. And you can read the sentiments there anyway - She's probably lying about being raped. She's just playing the race card. She's a stripper, so she can't be believed. She's a stripper, so she can't be raped. And, of course, They're good boys - because they're athletes, because they're rich and respectable. The minimization of the athletes' previous behavior as merely "inappropriate." The scoffing dismissal of the possibility that race played a role because racism somehow doesn't happen anymore.

It's here. It's not in some hidden corner of society. It's not only in this school, or that. It's in the everyday people all around us. I see it now, in a specific case - but this isn't new. I see and hear this shit all the time. More now that I've learned to read between the lines. Oh, it's "better" than it was before - 100 years ago? 50? But there's still way, way too much of it. It's there, and so many people buy into it, and so many people don't even care, that sometimes I don't even know what deluded dream could lead me to believe that I might somehow chip away at it.

I feel powerless. And yes, this is about power. The power of rich, white men to think nothing of sexually violating a poor, black woman. Maybe not in this particular case - there's always the possibility - but if not here, then goddamn everywhere else. Women getting hurt. Blacks getting hurt. Lesbians getting hurt. It's about domination, degradation, humiliation - the ability to bleed power and superiority out of someone else. And the ability, if you're the right kind of person, to have society let you do it.

It is absolutely vital, however, not to make the victim a symbol, or turn her story into some mythic representation of all oppression. The alleged crime happened to a real person. Whatever we can say about patterns of behavior or theories on society, she is more than a statistic or a news byte. She felt it and experienced it, and now has to keep experiencing it until this case is over - and forever afterward. what does that feel like, and what is it doing to her? I have no fucking clue. But this story ... it's a reminder. It triggers realizations. Realizations that make me feel tired and smothered and enraged and silenced and scared. And will I keep fighting and hoping? Of course. But it's never, never easy.

This is not my post for Blog to Raise Awareness About Sexual Violence. I had a different one planned, which I'll write later. Maybe.

Some highlights from what I've been reading this week:

-From Shrub.com, a post on Octavia Butler, notable primarily because it provides links to some of her stories and other writing. One of the links is to "Amnesty," a story I read last quarter for my sci-fi class - great stuff.

-Biting Beaver clarifies the statement that rape is about power, not sex. At the same time, she illuminates the connections that exist between sex and rape, while explaining why it would be hard to explain the concept to the population at large.

The rest of these links may make you want to kill things. They did for me. (Thanks to ratzeo for putting temporary moratorium on my angry ranting so my blood pressure didn't hit the roof.)

-In case anyone's forgotten that homophobia kills, Pandagon gives us a news story that refreshes our memories. The state of our country's law enforcement, people.

-We treat rape victims with the respect they deserve, right? Especially in court. Women only have to watch the video recording of the rape or risk jail time. The judge has since backed down - more likely from outside pressure than the realization that he's a fuckwit - but what does it say about us that this issue was even raised? (From Feministe.)

-Clearly inspired by the moral righteousness of the South Dakota abortion ban, Utah wants to enforce parental notification even in cases of incest. Because a father deserves to know if his daughter is having an abortion - even if he's also the father of the baby. "Abortion isn't about women's rights," says Republican Senator Chris Buttars. There you have it, straight from the horse's mouth. (Another one from Pandagon.)

-In light of the disgusting anti-abortion legislation that seems to be popping up everywhere, the information for women in South Dakota from Molly Saves the Day ought to be shared again. It's frightening and horrifying - but no more frightening or horrifying than what's going on in South Dakota, Utah, Mississippi, and god only knows where else.

*sigh* As ginmar put it so aptly: I swear, some days I feel like a proctologist with an overbooked schedule. Too many fucking assholes and not enough suppositories.

Britain gives the U.S. the finger.

I'm interested in what Dubya's response to this one will be ...

From feminist. Worth seeing, and worth passing on.

Geneviève Bergeron, 21

Hélène Colgan, 23

Nathalie Croteau, 23

Barbara Daigneault, 22

Anne-Marie Edward, 21

Maud Haviernick, 29

Barbara Maria Klucznik, 31

Maryse Leclair, 23

Annie St.-Arneault, 23

Michèle Richard, 21

Maryse Laganière, 25

Anne-Marie Lemay, 22

Sonia Pelletier, 28

Annie Turcotte, 21

Murdered because of their gender.